Holiday!

Haha! Again I'm back...Back to Sibu here. The night I reached here, I followed my mum to the last rehearsel preparation for the Sunday Service which will be conducted by kids. Erm...what I can say is Sunday's School nowadays are totally different from old days. Sorry to say I really hate Sunday's School when I am young. Maybe I dun know chinese which make me felt so left out among my friends. However, I only attend Sunday School until primary 4 only. After that, all the students have to bring chinese bible and read, for me :"that's it. Finish". So, I joined aunty Ma Nar (Malay) bible class lo. So that's my old stories. Haha..

A realistic world! Life like that~

My e-mail to him:

Pastor Chai,

Tq 4 your explaination on Melchizedek in previous e-mail.

Since 2 weeks ago, I am not happy. I really felt like I want to go to a planet where there are no people there. I dun like people here, in my campus. For example, a study’s notes which students should not have but my friend still download it and read the notes. It is very clearly stated that student shud not have the notes, only instructor allowed. I want to read the notes also, but that is wrong, that’s why I didn’t read.And when I sacrifice myself to accompany friend in need, another friend said I left her.I am not happy. Furthermore, she even misunderstood me. For example, I have 2 friends, when I tried to please my friend A, friend B will get jealous and said I left her out. I felt like I dun like this place. When I do wat is right, they will misunderstand me..I will not explain to my friends because I dun want any of our relationship to get worse. I always keep things myself.I have been not happy for 2 weeks already. I really give up already, really dun know wat to do…Some night I will just cry. Wat shud I do? Actually there are still some issues which I do not prefer to post it out in public... How to become happy?

Evelyn利翩

Reply :

利翩，你好，

看了你的来信，真的感觉到你身处在一个艰难的处境中，不同的民族的人生活在一起已经不容易了，再加上不同信仰，实在需要更多的忍耐。然而，这么多年来你都这样走过，相信你的胸襟比一般一直被同族、同信仰包围的人来得更加宽阔。你向神发的问题是对的（为什么把我放在非基督徒的圈子中），但我希望你是真心想从神得到答案的，而不是对神的一种责问。我常对基督徒说，不要以为所谓好的基督徒就是那些懂得参加教会聚会、读经、祷告、唱诗的人，甚至不一定是那些圣经考试一百分的人，真正要评价一个基督徒好不好，是要看他怎么样在这个信仰、价值观、人生观、道德观与他完全不同的环境中生活，就好象我们要测试一盏灯好不好，就必须把它放在黑暗的地方一样。

人与人的相处，有许多功课必须学习，我甚至可以说，人每一天的喜怒哀乐都是与人际有关。我们大部分的怒气都是人际引起的，可是想一想，我们记忆中最美丽的部分，岂不也是和别人一同快乐的日子吗？在人际产生矛盾的时候，我们总是很想逃避，但要是我们真的独居了，相信可能没过两天我们又想念朋友了。人际之所以如此叫人又爱又恨，是因为我们都是罪人，我们都不完全，都有软弱；我们对别人不满，别人也对我们不满；我们用自己的标准去套在人身上，人也用他的标准套在我们身上。每一个人的背景、养成、思想、习惯、说话方式都不同，而每个人都以自己的标准去衡量别人，其中所牵涉的互动关系是错综复杂的。基督徒要学会的重要功课之一，就是不要对人间存着太理想化的期待。当然，在一些违反圣经道德要求的事上我们不能妥协，甚至要去劝勉犯罪的人，但按照我的观察和经验，真正遇到这些道德问题的人不多，人际之间的矛盾大多数是与道德无关的事引起的。在这些很现实的环境中，我们一方面要顾及自己的基督徒见证，另一方面也需要学习欣赏和接纳和我们不同的人。人不只是要懂得在和谐中成长，也当懂得如何在别人的误解中成长。真正的信仰并不是与世隔绝去过隐居的生活，它必须在有血有肉的挣扎中才能绽放光彩。

你的来信中也提到一些关乎对错的道德问题，就是你的同学阅读一些不该阅读的资料。在别人做得不正确的时候，你应当劝勉（我相信你已经劝勉），但你终究无法控制别人，即使这样，你仍必须坚守自己做正确的事。当然，这结果可能影响考试的成绩，到最后选择做正确之事的正直人可能考得没有违规者好，这真叫人愤恨。但不要忘记，我们至终是要得神喜悦，再者，学习最重要的是自己从中学到什么，而不是成绩。用不正确的方法考得好成绩而自己不是真正从中学到功课，本质上并没有多大价值，还有，有了成就而败坏了品格，那更是不值得。除了信仰之外，品格永远是首要的！

以下圣经的话，愿与你共勉：
"Do not fret because of evil men or be envious of those who do wrong; for like the grass they will soon wither, like green plants they will soon die away. Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD ; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. " (Psalm37:1~6)

"Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," says the Lord. On the contrary: "If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head." Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. "(Rom12:17~21)

Andrew Chai

Evie: I posted this hoping that this can help u too! Friends, about the notes tingy I m x pointing to anyone, just a struggle for me during that time coz I dun know wat to do...But I ve found the solution now...Thx to Pr. Chai. Juz take d advices from the replied e-mail! I feel better after I read the replied e-mail. Luckily I went to class this morning. What Pr. Chai said was right, only do the things that is right in front of God. There is no use if the result was booming but the basic moral values was rotten. Haha...furthermore, the Physic quiz have been postponed to 5 p.m.!
And 1 more things, d topic for intro to medicine and pharmacy was damn interesting. Mira, Chai Peng and I didn't have a second to glance at our physic's notes. I was very interested in nuclear pharmacy! Challenging!

Foundation Night '09

With my besties...

My housemate, Safiah Abdullah...

My sis, Ong Chai Peng..

Special thanks to Ms. Fazilah, our event advisor...

My diary..#1

25th june 08,
Glory 2 God
He listen 2 my prayer. Last night He asked me 2 wait. God want me 2 b faithful 2 Him. 2day He had solved my problem. He sent an angel 2 me, Chai Peng. He let me know tat Chai Peng is a good n caring friend. He teach me x to critic or back stabbed ppl. Yes,all d glory 2 Him at the highest. Amen..

3rd July 08,
Haha..last night I dream I had an opportunity 2 have a talk wif Pastor Ting Ee Ling.. I ask her wether she wants 2 marry or not,coz 2 bcome a 牧师, one can't marry (female)..bt her answer is so weird! She asked me back who told me tat 2 bcome a 牧师,she can't gt married. Nway,its a dream oly after all.. Haha..so funny,y I feel so lost~

5th July 2008,
好高兴噢! 能够download诗歌.

7th July 2008,
I was stunted! As pastor Moh n her sister cm n sit beside me..
All begins in da morning..i go 2 morning prayer at 6.00 o'clock..we pray according to the Lord's prayer,conducted by Pastor Ting Ee Ling. During d break time,btween 6.30-7.00 am,i wantd 2 approach pastor 2 ask them 2 teach me about the 三位一体的神. But all of them seems so busy. Aftr tat, i go 2 airport..saw some senior which we r in same college in primary school. Go inside d airplane and unbelievable.. Pastor Mao n her sister cm n sit bside me! I afraid I wil 认错人. I cal 传道. She turned 2 me n ask which church I m from..I request tat she change place wif her sister..coz I ve questions 2 ask her.. For her is fine,so d cnversation startd.. 感谢主. 你太伟大了! Before this I told aunty Ma Nar there will not be any miracle in this world, but, God had let me experience it! There is miracle and God did send angel beside you~

25th Aug 2008,
Blessed are those who hunger and thirst 4 righteousness, for they will be filled..
Blessed are d peacemakers,for they will be called sons of God..

19th Oct 2008,
我不知道为什么哭了。真的好想家喔！

26th Oct 2008,
为什么我今天的心情这么差！今天的道很好。。说到'不公平'。。哈哈，
今天又想到我和毛传道在飞机上的相见，神真正的让我看见他的大能。我还有学到了一个功课，就是不要担心，神会预备给你的！就象我去晨祷会，为了要见牧师还是传道来解答我的神学问题，可是确没机会。。。但我还是相信我的神，想不到，他预备毛传道两个小时在机上跟我分享。。。奇迹都发生在我的身上，不可不信呀！神呀，我一身只跟随你！求你使用我吧。

2rd Nov 2008,
刚从理拜堂回来。 好累，好想主日学的小朋友，好想福源堂，好想卫斯理堂，好想听美英牧师，怡伶传道，毛传道，pastor Ting, pastor Lee n Rev. Tiong Chung Tiing's sermon.好渴慕义，好想家，好想家人！一下子肯定又哭了。陈利翩，加油！

27th Nov 2008,
刚才jungle trekking 完过后，感谢主。。。我跟彩萍传了福音。。我好希望她能得救，因她是我的好姐妹。。。

29th Dec 2008,
陈怡伶传道，go go 加油啊！--> today is her birthday!

16th Jan 2009,
我跟蔡传道分享了。不知道为何突然间跟他分享了有关我spm成绩的故事至到我遇到毛传道，后从网上遇到他的事情。。。主安排的太完美无霞了。然我见到毛传道后是蔡传道，后是长老会，后是ShuWan姐妹..是她在我伤心Chemistry考不好时SMS我说 we do our best,leave d rest 2 God..可能她也不知道她已成为我的天使！ 重而言之，我2009年学到的课程是：常常为别人感恩《怡伶传道》，成为别人的天使《蔡传道》。。。

31st Jan 2009,
真的很感恩，有这么好的姐姐; 很感恩，今天有去大保玲球，感恩,我还能呼吸，还有好多好多说不完的！ 感谢神！希望，彩萍早日接受耶稣基督！我做牛做马都心干情愿。。。我要她一家得救，这是我心愿！

10th Feb 2009,
我真的真的很怕面对明天！

21st March 2009,
12.32 a.m.-今天，为什么那么孤独呢？其实，我很不高兴，因为明天在福源堂将举行少年崇拜，而我不能参加。。。主题还是我最喜欢的诗歌：“我们爱，让世界不一样”。我深深觉得爱的那古力量太大了，能改变人心和这个败坏的世界。。讲员是陈怡伶传道。。喜望神能投过陈传道来感动众听者。。还有，她的妈妈到底好不好。。打电疗是很痛的，我能做的只有为她来祷告。我不喜欢看到人病痛，又其是主内弟兄姐妹！靠我真的无能为力，可是，我喜望主能够接着我的双手救跟多的病人。。我们在天上的父，我的生命是你的。。用我吧！求你带领我的明天。感谢主，给我还能在这一刻生呼吸。。愿我所作的能荣耀你圣洁宝贵的名，阿门。。。

福源家，我回来了！！

This morning, at around 5.40 a.m. I already get ready in my clothes. I wanted to go to the morning prayer meeting in my church. However, who knows? my bro cudn't wake up. Want to drive my mum didn't allow. Impossible will I ask my grandma to send me, she sleep late at night. My mum is still at the Bintulu. So, at last, I didn't go. Then, accompany LawMing to the Sunday service, I wanted her to concentrate with the sermon because I heard she is having some problems in understanding what the pastor preach. However, she still leave early. Hmm..I failed. My actual plan is to help out the Sunday School's Kids. Nevermind la..

Here is my feelings today. I was very happy when I am back to the Masland Methodist Church, feel like "I m BACK!"

I call it a day...

Quite sad ar.. Just now didn't go to prayer meeting, joining the CCF's brother and sister. I wanted to go but my mum didn't allow. Haiz~ She said I will be walking alone at night. Then, can't go lo...Hm..However, yesterday I did experience God. Just in a time that I feel so down and weak, God always send an angel for me, unexpected. Last night I woke up at 7.58 like that-check my handphone and found out that there was 2 messages. 1 is from my friend, that's not important. Another one is from 毛传道 ，她写：“不管多忙都不要忘了呼吸（深深的呼吸 一下。。。有些东西虽然微小，却十分重要。。。有些东西虽然一直存在，不代表它一定要存在。。。感恩，因为我们还能呼吸。。。利翩，加油，神与你同在+" 这短短的短迅真的给了我力量。 我才发觉我忙着考试，忙到没有给自己时间修息。。。没有感恩。。。属灵的事不小心就便成了属世的事了。怪不得蔡传道叫我要小心。 感谢主，他真的很疼很疼我。 不让我跌倒的太深 。他也同过雪儿姐，在门徒课程里告诉我，读书到不读圣经是罪！那时我哭了，我觉得我的罪太多了，真的不配接受神的恩典！

Reflection :
他那么爱我，我也应当回应呀！从今天开始，我要为他而活。我要多投入一点，做神所喜悦的事。标杆人生为生命粮食！利翩，加油。。。太爱睡了，明天若有时间的话，在据须分享我“更像耶稣”的经历。

在至高之处，荣耀歸臾上地，
在地上喜乐歸舆他所喜悦的人。

Happy Belated Birthday, Aqi~