I don't know where did all my feelings gone? A breast cancer patient who only has most probably 8 months left standing giving a speech in front of me. Some of my friends cried, but for me...it's just "owh, ok." So simple! I wonder why I acted this way. Did I feel pity for her? Did I feel sad for her? Oh beb! Undergo Chemo is damn pain ok! But, how come I feel so calm about that matter? I thought if she was my patient and I acted in that way, she could have already give a punch on my face...so emotionless... Btw, how to be emotion ya???
And yesterday after I came out from the exam hall, I got a message from Olivia that our friend, Lilian Hii had been admitted into the hospital. She is now isolated because she had been attacked by A influenza, confirmed H1N1. But then, what do I feel? Maybe a little bit sad because actually this week many things happened to me and I really looking forward for Saturday morning prayer meeting to share my stories with her and would like to seek some of her advice. Then, I don't know what to feel anymore? At the same time, I did SMS her asking a lot of silly questions also, and d most weird one sound like this, "how do u feel?" Why did I sent her that kind of message? Because I don't feel anything and hope that by knowing how she feel could let me develop my feelings towards the patient in future. Now, I was quite worry about my "emotionless!" Can feel quite a lost when she is not around in Cyber here, no Saturday morning prayer meeting means there is no sharing. Hm... People will never appreciate until they lost it :)
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