Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Are you willing to wait?

22th Dec 09

It's very tiring. I just woke up from my bed...slept at 1.40pm just now while listening to Rev. Stephen Tong mp3. Just dunno why I was so tired, feel that my body is weak and dun have energy even I had slept for hours...This morning I received a message from 碧志,"冬至快乐!"。Ya, exactly what is this? I dunno what happen to me recently, maybe a bit sad or disappointed coz I can't join the Christmas event in Masland Methodist Church. At the same time, maybe I was disappointed with certain people, but then, I can't expect everyone to be exactly like me! As I learned in Behavioral Science, human have different behaviors! So, let them have their ways but I must not follow their footsteps. I will keep loving and caring.

This is what I got from Rev. Tong Q n A questions session. When you sinned, you will feel that everyone is sinning as you were. However, when you are in pain and you met many obstacles in your life journey, you acted as though you are the only one in pain and suffering. That's all the works of satan. So, Christian, strengthen up!

Ya, its 4p.m. now and I just realized that I haven't eaten anything except for 2 pieces of biscuit at 8a.m. just now...But then, Im x hungry...


Psychology 这科真有趣。学习人的behaviors。我会说,靠着耶稣,我们一定能胜过一切人类奇怪的behaviors! 可是,考试里要是我那样回答,肯定零分! 我才发觉,有时我对她的prejudice 太 postive 了。。。带来失望:-)可是我之少学到了功课。谢谢妳和再见,这位朋友!愿神赐福与妳(^^)


别人正在圣诞节报佳音,我呢?Behavioral Science, homeworks...bla bla bla...not complaining actually...just that, is this the sacrifice I have to make? Sometimes, the torture is unbearable and tears roll downs automatically...To be optimistic, I will call it sweet suffering as what Prof. Hatta said? People around me encourage me with words for example:
1. Evelyn, you can do it!
2. 加油!
3. 毛虫变蝴蝶咯,什么老鹰的。。。
4. bla bla bla...

But, who knows what I am feeling right now? I guess it's time for me to accept CDPC as my home. When I walked in CDPC (City Discipleship Presbyterian Church), it always remind me of Masland Church but I think its time to accept other churches in my heart as "my home". The people there is friendly also. Maybe it's just because I haven't serve here ba..

Saturday, December 19, 2009

13th December 09 - A Turning Point

I planned to go to the morning prayer meeting at 6 but unfortunately, I woke up late. that morning. So, my mood was not good but I still make my way to the church. I sat behind. During the morning prayer, some tears role down as I felt very sorry as I did raise my voice a little bit higher to my mother because I woke up late. I didn't join the first Sunday service because I failed to calm my anger. So, I decided to went back home. I managed to finish up my homework in between the free time and at 8.30a.m., again I was following my mum heading to the church. I didn't help in the Sunday School Ministry because I had to attend the church 2nd service and that day Pastor Ting Ee Ling was in-charge in preaching the sermon(which is a MUST go- for me!) Actually a phrase in her sermon which really stuck in my mind is: "It's time for you to walk out of your own conflict." Of coz she spoke to all. Again, I was thinking, have I walk out of my own conflict ? The answer is: not sure.." Then, I continued to listen to her sermon.

And ya, after the service, I met Pastor Moh first as I passed a cute keychain for her, as a souvenir for her as she us going to leave Masland Methodist Church by this end of December. After that I went to see...erm.. a person which I really gonna miss after this - Pastor Ting .. as I didn't buy anything to her..juz give her a goodbye hug (".) That's all. Again, I forgot to ask about her mum's condition... I was so useless!

Then, heading towards airport (which I really hate!!) after lunch. My flight delayed. Know what I was thinking? I was thinking of "假假不小心睡着" and miss the flight. Then I dun have to come back to Cyberjaya. However, of coz my dream didn't came true as I wish. Arrive in Cyberjaya, I was damn tired already, but I just know from Melinda that afternoon about MMU CCF is having their last fellowship, and it's a Christmas celebration! I went, because I was escaping being in my bedroom which I knew I will definitely cried because I missed Sibu and I dun want to be in Cyberjaya.

So I went, quite fun playing games with the MMU CCFers and we had a gift exchange session. I was tired when I reached home so after I have my daily devotional time with God, I decided to sleep. But then... dunno why I have a look at the CD packet which come together with a mini book on testimonies which I got for my Christmas gift, and guess wat? I flip tru d buk and a sentence caught my eye: "遇见未来-如果当初我出国,现在的我会是如何的?" I quickly read the testimony. How this is related to me???:

I used to always repeated this thousands times - (1) 如果当初我不去滨城读高中,现在的我会是如何的? (2)如果当初我去法国留学当教师,现在的我会是如何的?

After I read that testimony, I was very happy. The lesson that I learned from that short testimony were 感恩(thanksgiving) and 自足(satisfaction). That night, I prayed. I decided not to complain anything anymore. No more "if" in my life. Life will go on and I am new Evelyn. No longer the old one. It's time to change! Thanks God as you bring me out of my own conflict. No more regrets. I will study hard and become a good and responsible doctor, to glorify his name, to fix in His redemption's plan. Thanx...I really enjoyed my first week of Behavioral Science! No complains, no turning back, only thanksgiving and satisfaction, onwards, little soldier! Onwards little eagles! U gonna spread ur wings and fly, ONEDAY!

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

What I want to voice out a month ago!

Try to write one or two words while reformatting my brother's computer.

Honestly, I dun like people forcing me harshly especially it comes with the things to do about the religion. It is ok for me if you keep on advising or nagging consistently without giving up but I hate people forcing. Aren't we depend on the work of Holy Spirit? Wat is the purpose if you force somebody to do something which they dun like. From there, they will lost their sincerity and they will do "watever u forced them to do" for the sake of u, not God anymore. Is that what you wish to see? Let us not just bombard "people" with the speech or words, but why dun we apply it in our daily activities? Perhaps you could care "him or her" a little bit more? Instead of forcing her to go to the cell group meeting, why dun you asked how is her life in campus? Have "he or she" eaten yet? How's her family? Everyone is doing good? ... There is a lot more you can do instead of talking too much. Maybe you will conclude many things as our excuses but sometimes, it might not be an excuse. Maybe "he or she" knows a little bit only but at least she knows "Jesus loves you". Perhaps she should go to the mirror and have some reflection on herself, is stuborn also an excuse? Pls. be more practical then u r good in talking... I can change, I believe u can change as well..

Does God exists?

This is one of the best explanations of why God allows pain and suffering that I have seen...

A man went to a barbershop to have his hair cut and his beard trimmed.
As the barber began to work, they began to have a good conversation.
They talked about so many things and various subjects.
When they eventually touched on the subject of God, the barber said:
'I don't believe that God exists.'

'Why do you say that?' asked the customer. 'Well, you just have to go out in the street to realize that God doesn't exist.
Tell me, if God exists, would there be so many sick people?
Would there be abandoned children?

If God existed, there would be neither suffering nor pain.
I can't imagine a loving God who would allow all of these things.'
The customer thought for a moment, but didn't respond because he didn't want to start an argument.
The barber finished his job and the customer left the shop.

Just after he left the barbershop, he saw a man in the street with long, stringy, dirty hair and an untrimmed beard.
He looked dirty and unkempt.. The customer turned back and entered the barber shop again and he said to the barber:
'You know what? Barbers do not exist.'
'How can you say that?' asked the surprised barber.
'I am here, and I am a barber. And I just worked on you!'
'No!' the customer exclaimed. 'Barbers don't exist because
if they did, there would be no people with dirty long hair and untrimmed beards, like that man outside.'

'Ah, but barbers DO exist! That's what happens when people do not come to me.'
'Exactly!' affirmed the customer. 'That's the point! God, too, DOES exist!
That's what happens when people do not go to Him and don't look to Him for help.
That's why there's so much pain and suffering in the world.'

If you think God exists, send this to other people---
If you think God does not exist, delete it


Good or Bad, hard to say!

Once upon a time, there was a king. The king liked one of his followers very much because he was very wise and always gave very useful advice. Therefore the king took him along wherever he went.

One day, the king was bitten by a dog, the finger was injured and the wound was getting worse. He asked the follower if that was a bad sign. The follower said, Good or bad, hard to say'. In the end, the finger of the king was too bad that had to be cut. The king asked the follower again if that was a bad sign. Again, the follower gave the same answer, 'Good or bad, hard to say'. The king became very angry and sent the follower to prison.

One day, the king went hunting in the jungle. He got excited when he was on the chase of a deer. Deeper and deeper he went inside the jungle. In the end he found himself lost in the jungle. To make thing worse, he got captured by the native people lived inside the jungle.

They wanted to sacrifice him to their god. But when they noticed that the king had one finger short, they released him immediately as he was not a perfect man anymore and not suitable for sacrifice. The king managed to get back to his palace after all. And he finally understood the follower's wise quote, 'Good or bad, hard to say'. If he hadn't lost one finger,he could have been killed by the
native people.

He ordered to release the follower, and apologized to him. But to the king amaze, the follower was not mad at him at all. Instead, the follower said, 'It wasn't a bad thing that you locked me up.' Why? Because if the king hadn't locked the follower up, he would have brought the follower along to the jungle. If the native found that the king was not suitable, they would have used the follower. Again, the quote 'Good or bad, hard to say' stands.

The moral of the story:
Everything that happens in this world, there is no absolute good or bad. Sometimes good things turned out to be bad things eventually, while bad things become a gain.

Whatever good things that happen to you, enjoy it, but don't have to hold too tight to it, treat it as a surprise in your life.Whatever bad things that happen to you, don't have to feel too sad or despair, in the end, it might not be a total bad thing after all.

If one can understand this, he or she will find life much easier.